I Was Thinking... Hospitality

As a youngster, there was nothing I dreaded more on a beautiful Sunday afternoon than my folks saying, “Let’s go for a ride.” Sunday was a day I could ride my bike, play ball, or just be outside. I did not want to sit in a car as my dad checked out the neighbors’ crops or stopped at some friends or relatives of my folks for a “visit” with people I hardly knew and that had no kids.
But this was often a favorite pastime for my folks. It was also accepted etiquette of the time to just drop in on somebody.
You expected to be welcomed and usually offered at least a cup of coffee and maybe a small lunch. People were hospitable. Today, just dropping in on somebody may be considered a breach of good manners.
With a couple of exceptions, today most people wait to be invited, before they stop over at your house. It is amazing how many people have never been in their neighbor’s home.
Yet, one of the major struggles for many people in society today is loneliness. Despite an abundance of new ways in which we can communicate, that old style of hospitality seems to be lacking. But being hospitable can be expressed in many different ways.
My wife has a circle of friends that she calls on a regular basis. With the advent of cell phones, calling friends a distance away is no longer a barrier. Men, however, rarely call to just chat. For them, hospitality is associated with some type of event.
They will go for coffee at a local establishment, get together to attend a game, or may shoot a couple of games of pool or be in a bowling league. It is easier if we do something while we socialize. Pickleball is one of the fastest growing sports in America and draws thousands of seniors. While the exercise and competition is a draw, so is the socialization. It is hospitality played out on a court.
When it finally warms up enough to go camping again, we will drive the one hour to the lake to the campground. But what is the draw of camping? Again, it is the hospitality exhibited at the campground. People you might not otherwise have much in common, for a weekend become friends. While two or three of us will head out to a lake to try our luck at fishing, our wives are satisfied to stay behind and enjoy coffee and donuts. Playing cards, throwing bean bags, or just sitting around a campfire are all examples of campground hospitality.
Since many of the people I associate with are retired, we don’t go to work anymore. But while most of us enjoy our retirement, we say the thing we miss the most about our jobs was the people. We were a part of a social network at our jobs. One of the things that most people who work from home complain about is the lack of interaction with colleagues. We are social animals and crave interaction. There is a reason solitary confinement is considered one of the cruelest of all punishments.
While many churches went with zoom services during the pandemic, something still was missing from the message parishioners received. They missed the congregation. There is something extra about worshipping with a group of people.
We strive to congregate. The sound of a jointly sung hymn or recited prayer means more. It was not just the service itself but also the time before and after a service where people met and visited. Many churches have a coffee hour after the service that is an extension of the congregational hospitality.
So, despite the layer of dust, the less than spotless floor, or the fact the house isn’t going to be featured in Better Homes and Gardens, people will be happy to be invited over for some coffee, a game of cards, or just to experience that old time feeling of hospitality.
Did You Ever Wonder? — Do Lipton employees get coffee breaks?