I Was Thinking... Communicating
We all communicate in one way or another. I know some people who are quiet and soft spoken. In a group I meet with regularly, one guy in particular hardly says a word the whole time we are together. But he is a great listener because when he does talk, it is always on point and something you should pay attention to.
I also have known some people that can’t seem to stop talking. I’ve been on some short car trips with them and for the whole time, they never stopped talking. If you want to get a word in, you need to jump in when they stop to take a breath.
Recently our Lions club had several members of the Kasson-Mantorville FCCLA Club (Family, Career, & Community Leaders of America) spoke to our members. These students were from 13 to 17-years-old. They were presenting to a group of nearly 40 adults.
If you had asked me to do that at that age, my knees would have been shaking and I would have stuttered and stammered through the whole talk. But not so with these young men and women. They possessed poise and confidence beyond their years and were able to communicate so efficiently.
The FCCLA organization has helped to develop these young people into effective leaders. The K-M Chapter has had several members serve in both statewide and national leadership roles. It instills confidence in our future when you see how these young people speak, organize, and achieve their organizational goals.
While these students exhibited their proficiency at public speaking, it is still a major phobia for many people. Lions’ members take their motto, “We Serve” seriously and are quick to volunteer to help with most projects. But when asked to serve as president, where you have to stand up in front and lead a meeting, many give a resounding “NO WAY,” I just can’t do that.
Observing communication patterns between men and women is an interesting study. It is said that women use at least twice the number of words as men. Some women say they have to because their husbands don’t hear them the first time.
Couples communication is a fascinating investigation. Some couples seem to balance each other. One talks a lot and the other is quiet. It could be because the one who talks a lot never gives the other a chance to get a word in. But it isn’t always the female that is the prolific talker. One wife refers to her husband as “Chatty Cathy.”
The analysis concerning telephone use by men and women is a remarkable example of communication contrast between the sexes. For the most part, men use a telephone as a tool to communicate an idea, inquire about something or solidify a detail with the other party. Men’s telephone conversations generally last five minutes or less. For women, the telephone appears to be an instrument of social interaction.
Many times, when I return from being somewhere, I walk in the house to find my wife on the phone. These aren’t detailed orientated conversations with a definite purpose. They just call “to talk.” These free-flowing exchanges can continue for lengths of time that would make most men uncomfortable.
Verbal communication that I’ve discussed here, is now almost an antiquated art in today’s techno infused society. Texts, e-mails, and tweets have often replaced the spoken word. While they may be quicker and be able to reach many more people at one time, they lack the personal connection that comes to talking with another person.
It is sad to see a family sit down for a meal at a restaurant and rather than interact with the people right there, they each direct their attention to a device in front of them. We owe it to our family, friends, and ourselves to divorce ourselves from the electronic world once in a while and engage in some real communication with each other.
Did You Ever Wonder? — Why can’t you talk to somebody on a help line on this side of the ocean?
Photo: I was thinking Ron Albright